A McDonalds Metaphor

AJ Teaters

A McDonalds Metaphor

So this is what’s wrong with us (human beings), we try and fix everything on the outside. This isn’t a new idea or concept; I’m definitely not the Socrates of the modern age, but something caught my eye in the newspaper this week. “McDonald's revamps stores to look more upscale” an article by USA Today, talks about how McDonalds is remodeling and restructuring the image they present with their “stores”. Can I just say that this is the perfect metaphor for Americans? What better parallel than using a fast food chain that started in America to show just how messed up Americans are! Thanks McDonalds I knew I could count on you.


Here’s the skinny (or should I not use that word in relation to McDonalds), I guess it sounds better than here’s the fatty (that sounds like I’m referenecing drugs or porn O_o). Anyways, this is what McDonalds has released to the press about their upcoming plans (which they coin as “highlights”):

• Redoing roofs. The bright red roofs that have topped McDonald's for several decades are getting the heave, replaced with flatter, more conventional roofs.
  


• Muting paint. The neon yellows and reds common to the interiors and exteriors are becoming history, replaced with much more subtle oranges, reds, yellows and even greens.
  


• Nixing fiberglass. The familiar fiberglass tables that have been a mainstay are being replaced mostly by wood.
  


• Updating chairs. Those industrial steel chairs are giving way to wooden chairs, colorful stools and, in some cases, vinyl-covered chairs that resemble leather. Some stores will have larger lounge chairs similar to the kind you might expect to find in a coffee shop.
  


• Doubling drive-throughs. To ease lines inside and outside stores, many locations are adding second drive-through windows to speed up service.
  


• Splashing color. McDonald's hasn't junked it's familiar red and yellow colors altogether, but it is making them far less obvious. Instead of filling the restaurants with them, it's splashing bright yellow and red here and there for effect.
  


• Junking the fluorescent look. Overhead fluorescent lights are being replaced with more contemporary lamps that make the lighting in stores look less like that of offices.
  


• Dividing dining areas. The sea of tables and chairs is history in the remodeled stores. The new dining rooms are divided into separate eating zones for larger groups, eat-and-run customers and folks who want to stay and lounge.
  


• Adding flat-screens TVs. Large, flat-screen TVs — some playing contemporary music — are showing up in many locations, though fewer than half of the remodeled stores will display them.
  


• Erecting semi-swooshes. Curving across the top of the newly flattened roof is what McDonald's calls the yellow "brow" — or half of a golden arch. It's got the familiar, bright-yellow design but encased in a Nike swoosh-like arc.
  

All the article talks about is making McDonalds not look like a McDonalds. They are taking inspiration from Starbucks and Apple. They want their store to feel like a place you can hang out in after you eat the most processed and disgusting food on the market. They say that they are continuing to revamp the menu as well, but recent additions such as their 'oatmeal' (read more here) leave their decision making skills very suspect.


My whole thought process on this story is, "Why is Mcdonalds spending 1 billion dollars on giving their stores a face-lift when they should be overhauling their menu to be healthier?!" "Why are they fixing the outside when they should be fixing what's going on inside first?" "All companies care about is money, not the product they are producing or how it affects the general public." Hopefully I'm not too far off in my thought process. What I am hoping is that you readers would have thought the same thing when you picked up USA Today and saw this article. If you didn't, that's O.K., I'm here to tell you how to think.


To use this as a metaphor for (humans, specifically Americans) is quite simple... We try and fix our outside image to hid what is truly wrong with what is going on inside of us. We hate the way we look, and think that we would be better off if we have a better body, face, bigger boobs, smaller buns, tighter thighs, a six pack (abs, not beer), a different nose, different eyes, fuller lips, less wrinkles... transplants, implants, suction, tucking, banding, lasering, lifting and injecting! How's this for a final thought on the metaphor: When we eat Mcdonalds we are knowingly putting "poison" in our bodies, and when we inject Botox into our bodies we are knowingly putting "poison" in our bodies!

Excerpt From Article:

Her mom, Melanie, who also is a nurse, says she, too, likes the redesign but hopes it signals a redesign of something else at McDonald's: the food.

"I'm hoping," she says, while watching her crew of preteens down a tray-load of burgers, fries and soft drinks, "this means McDonald's will also be bringing in more fresh fruits."

This woman wants the redesign to help prompt a redesign of the food McDonalds serves. She knows it's bad, but she still has, "her crew of preteens down a tray-load of burgers, fries and soft-drinks." Wouldn't the best redesign for her be, to NOT go to McDonalds any more? Oh, I'm sorry that's probably too inconvenient nowadays.

This excerpt the attitude of 'us' in a nutshell, "I want change, but I hope someone else does it for me, or I'm too lazy to change."

Go America!

*No McDonalds workers were harmed in the publishing of this post.